I am still here
15 years ago
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Panic Attacks
I have been having massive panic attacks.I wish this was like the flu and would just go away. I am afraid to leave the house. I am afraid of strangers. I wish there was some one else like me. I feel so alone. If there is someone else I would sure like to here from you. Like what was your experience ? What did you do and how did you get over it?
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panic attacks sucks.I had a friend out in Ca that suffered panic attacks so severe that it would trigger a seizure.
ReplyDeleteI have had them too.
ReplyDeleteYou have my number if you ever need to talk......... (Betty Ann)
I work from home a lot and if you need me.. I'll listen until it passes. (hugs)
I have not had one in a while I don't know much other than trying to keep busy and talking them out. if you need to take a minute and breathe and then try to talk or write about it. I will keep a prayer for you and for them to pass.
ReplyDeleteI had them in my late teens early 20s. A lot of "stuff" came together at that time and I just overloaded. First I was so scared of them that I made them worse. We lived in a real small village with a dear old doctor who'd never dealt with anything like that. He gave me seeping tablets... which didn't help diddly and I couldn't sleep either!
ReplyDeleteThen, when I read up and found out what they were, I got angry. I was angry at my body mostly. I learnt to just ride them out. For me letting go of trying to control them made them ease off. The less I fought to keep in control, the less long the panic attacks lasted.
I went back to college for a year, because I'd become a recluse and needed to start living again. I went back and did a year of sewing and fashion design. It was great fun. Yes, at first I had a few attacks in class, but I just waited, let them flow over me like waves of the ocean... and I didn't drown. ;-)
By the 2nd month of my classes they were gone completely. Since then I've had maybe one or two, at times where life got really extreme.
But... I'm borderline at the moment. I married, moved countries, left my job, my friends etc, couldn't find work in Scotland, hubby's business went under, we lost our savings, we lost our only baby (miscarriage) and in the last few months I'm borderline a lot. It's like the panic attack is sitting on my chest, waiting to get back in. I feel tense constantly and at this stage I'm freaking out a lot. Getting angry more, scared more, weepy more. I am on hormone medication that may be adding to the problem. It's made me zoom up in weight, makes my joints ache and makes me feel confused and tired.
At this stage, with this new feeling of ... feeling cr*p (sorry, no other word fits)... I'm not sure where I'm going now. I had one appt with the gynae last week, who was too busy to oisten to me, and I have an appt with a surgeon tomorrow (hernia) and I'm not sure this is his department either! I've never taken meds for anxiety and don't want to start. I think exercise would help, as it drains the adrenalin, but getting yourself motivated to exercise when you're stuck at home and feeling YUCK... not easy!
The worst is, because I'm so mood swingy, I can come across as perfectly fine, because I feel that way, today and even an hour later be a weepy shaky mess. :-( At the moment I'm trying to time all my blogging to the good moments. LOL
Anyway, you really are not alone. There are forums, chat places, al over the internet for people with anxiety etc. I've been pottering on two which relate to my illnesses (endometriosis and fibromyalgia) and I've seen lots of similar pones. They are full of really nice people. Maybe you shoul think of having a look around and joining a few, or even joining ones that deal with support for bi-polar? It might be more useful to "talk" more regular to others than to just blog. I've found forums much more useful, when I feel bad, then blogging. I've made great friends in both places, but the forums are where I have a chance to ask deeper questions and get more "conversation", which I think you need.
Sending you a hug!